As I sit down to write this grovelling post of how sorry I am for neglecting my blog recently – I just got this huge wave of comfort as I started tapping away in this little box to text, knowing that I was writing words to go back onto my blog.
I have missed writing my blog so much over the past week SO THATS A GREAT SIGN.
I wanted to write a MEGA apologetic post for the HUGE amount of time between my last post and this one – and also the disappearance of my ‘Five Things That Made Me Happy’. Don’t worry people (or person – no clue if anyone was reading them) THEY WILL BE BACK ASAP.
As you may have realised from my social media / youtube etc – I AM IN NYC, trying to live my best life, be Carrie Bradshaw and eat everything in site. But it has actually been SO much harder to do all of that than I had thought. This is because we are ‘living’ here and trying to keep on top of our jobs, rather than being on VACAY.
I am here with my gal pal Ells (theellenextdoor.com) and we are here for 3 weeks and I thought it would all be sunshine and rainbows and the best time EVER. And don’t get me wrong – we are having an incredible time and it has been an amazing experience which I will never ever forget , and my oh my have we LAUGHED – but I never thought that it would be this hard to keep on top of everything whilst being a fabulous wannabe New Yorker. But it has been super tough and we have had so many stress completed meltdowns trying to do everything without spending out life sitting in Starbucks instead of walking around.
I am living off 5 hours (max) sleep per night – as by the time we get in in the evenings and I have edited a youtube video or had a shower etc and edited my photo to post on instagram for the next day it is usually around 1:30am and then I have to set my alarm at 5am/5:30am to post the photo at a normal London time. And then it is back out, searching for more Instagram images and places to eat and trying to fit time in to actually have fun and play rather than just running around trying to get the ‘shot’. And as there are two of us trying to find photos – everything takes twice as long.
So once it gets to 1:30am – I just can’t keep my eyes open to write my daily blog posts – and I feel so guilty and disappointed that I have let them slip. BUT I PROMISE to get back on top asap.
I feel like I am just letting myself down, and being all moaning Myrtle BUT I know that I just need to throw myself into each day so I don’t get home and think ‘oh if only I had not been so stressed out and anxious that day’ as how often can you just head to NYC for 3 weeks?
Also – let me tell you all something – anxiety doesn’t give a f*** if you are in your favourite city. It doesn’t care about time zones or expectations. It just follows you wherever you plan to go – like a clingy puppy… but so not as cute or loveable or wanted.
I can’t wait to get back to a normal routine and get back to daily blogging and feel on top of life a bit more – but for now, I am going to spend that last week of my trip, squeezing every last bit of happiness and magic out of this city that I love SO much.
So please accept this apology – and here are some photos from my trip so far to keep you a bit more in the loop 🙂